GOVERNOR CALIGULA?

2/18/09

Legend has it that the mad Emperor Caligula appointed his horse, Incitatus, to the Roman Senate in the 30s. (Note that I have inserted no “ ‘ “ before “30s” because those were the aught 30s.) That story may well be true; the tides of history become murky after 2,000 years. The more accurate story may be, however, that Caligula tried to make Incitatus a consul or a priest, rather than a senator, but the former story is more apt to our political situation in Illinois.

It looks as though, while there is no evidence that Rod Blagojevich idolized Caligula, as he did Richard Nixon, our mad former governor has achieved a feat worthy of Caligula by leaving us with Roland Burris as our junior senator. Mr. Burris’s story concerning a possible, keeping with the Latin theme of this post, quid pro quo for his Senate seat has changed on numerous occasions. First, he had no contact with any of Blago’s people concerning the Senate seat. Then it seems he talked to Lon Monk but promised no cash for the seat. Then the story evolved, after the possibility arose that the Feds may have been listening to his conversations, to the point at which that, well, Roland had spoken with several other of the governor’s cronies, including the governor’s brother Rob, but still promised no money. In its latest iteration, Mr. Burris had tried, but failed, to raise money for Governor Rod, at the governor’s brother’s request, and then claimed it wouldn’t be such a good idea to do what he had failed to do because raising funds would present a conflict for an aspiring U.S. Senator. And we know that no U.S. Senator wants to get involved in conflicts of interest, no sir.

Clearly Roland Burris is lying. There is nothing unique or original in this observation. But here are a few more observations.

First, not to beat on a dead horse, but the national media knows ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about Chicago politics. They had Roland portrayed as a man on white horse, even applied expressions like “unimpeachable integrity” to Mr. Burris. As I said in my 12/30 post, ROLAND, ROLAND, ROLAND, KEEP THEM PUNDITS ROLLIN’… (which was, by the way, the first use of the old “Rawhide” theme in this context):

“We are told that Mr. Burris is such a stellar citizen that the Senate will have no choice but to seat him. Roland Burris? A knight in shining armor? C’mon! Roland is a nice enough guy, and his wife is a genuinely wonderful person. But he is little more than a garden variety Chicago politician.”

I went on to say that

“There’s nothing wrong with being a Chicago politician, and Roland Burris has been a mildly successful one, though it would be hard to convince Roland of the latter. But before the national media makes Burris a crusader on a white horse for all that is good and pure, perhaps they’d better do their homework regarding the inner workings of politics in the nation’s greatest city. Oh, I forgot…that would involve living here, a horrifying prospect for the New York and Washington based national media.”

It turns out that I was being unfair to Chicago politicians. They may shade the truth once in awhile, but they do so with more aplomb, or at least with more bluster, and shame, than Roland Burris. He simply gets up there and lies and expects us to believe it.

Second, at the risk of making a prediction that will turn out to be wrong, like my 12/30 prediction that Burris would not be seated, Roland Burris will in all likelihood remain in the Senate at least until his term expires in 2010. Why? As I said in my 1/13/09 post, “I WAS WAY OFF!”,

“As soon as it was hinted that blocking Mr. Burris’s appointment could be construed as even remotely racist, Messrs, Durbin and Reid, as is the wont of most politicians, folded like a cheap card table, or a certain baseball team that plies its trade on Chicago’s north side.”

The Democrats in the Senate, and Harry Reid and Dick Durbin in particular, simply do not have the guts to stand up to the race card. They will not censure the Senate’s only Black member. Further, while Burris is clearly lying, this doesn’t look like outright perjury (though those much more well versed in the law than I might make a convincing counter-argument), so the Sangamon County perjury investigation will probably go nowhere. Finally, Roland Burris is not going to resign.

Third, President Obama deserves some of the blame for putting this latest liar in the Senate. With a heavy legislative agenda, he was in a hurry to get a Democrat seated and to put the Burris controversy behind him before the inauguration, so he put pressure on Senate Democrats (as if such pressure were needed with these lilliputians) to seat Burris. Though Obama was never a political insider in Chicago, he had spent enough time around and accommodating Chicago politics to know about Roland Burris’s character. It didn’t seem to bother him that his state would be represented by a man who plays especially and blatantly loose with the truth.