"Trust me on this...it's for their own good."

9/10/07

In today’s (i.e., 9/10/07’s) Chicago Sun-Times, columnist Neil Steinberg wrote an article wondering why self-described “morally superior” people would insist on making the lives of gay people as miserable as possible even though the self-appointed guardians of all things morally pure are convinced that gays will spend eternity in hell. (This brief description does not do Neil’s column justice; you would do well to read it at suntimes.com. In fact, you would do well to read all of Neil’s columns; while I disagree with him on many issues, especially on religion, Neil and I have a remarkably similar world view, characterized by cynicism and general lack of optimism, which I, and I suspect Neil, would characterize as “realism.” For my part, I would some day like to lose this outlook; I’m not so sure Neil feels the same way, but that is another issue. At any rate, I rarely miss a Steinberg column and just as rarely do I not get at least one good laugh out of his writing.) Steinberg invited his readers to please let him know why this insistence on tormenting one’s fellow man is so prevalent and predominant in the lives of people who consider themselves followers of a loving God. I wrote the following letter to Neil with what I think is a plausible answer:


9/10/07

Hi Neil,

I think I have the answer to your query regarding self-described morally superior types’ insistence on tormenting gay people in this world despite the certainty on the part of the tormentors that the tormentees will spend eternity paying for their sins in the fires of Gehenna.

Those who exhibit this odd fixation on the sexual proclivities of gay people insist that being gay is a choice. (This is a very strange notion. I, for example, would no sooner have sex with, say, you or anyone with your particular body parts than I would take a late night stroll on an unlit Dan Ryan Expressway. Yet, the morally certain are convinced that people somehow choose to have sex with people of their own gender because it is, I don’t know, convenient, more widely available, easy, or, I suppose, a sign of rebellion against Americanism as surely as is membership in the Democratic Party. But I digress.) If, according to this line of “reasoning,” we can make those who choose to be gay suffer some horrific consequences for such a choice, then perhaps they will repent of their sins and pursue blameless love lives worthy of such paragons of the “moral” movement as Reverend Ted Haggard and Senator Larry Craig. So, by making the lives of gay people as absolutely miserable as they can, these champions of proper living are seeking to save gays from eternal hell fire. Sort of like destroying a town in order to save it, I know, but I’m just reporting, not defending.

Thanks, Neil.